Meme Dream

Dan and I are with a group of people on a tour in a tropical destination near the beach.

The tour leader is discussing mediocre memes and we are bored.

Tour Leader (speaking to the brothers Berger): "Fine, I'll destroy a perfectly innocent meme and we'll see what you think then! See that Lincoln penny sitting on that girl's beach towel for good luck? I am gonna pick that up and throw it into the ocean."

Tour leader throws the penny into the ocean.

Dan and I look at each other, smile and say, "NOT A MEME!"

Give me a Smith & Wesson, I'll have niggaz undressin'

No, really.


This picture is from the Fall, but I had been meaning to post it for awhile. See below for the results of some of my target practice:

Changing an old canard

People always talk about great stories (getting arrested for public urination) and moments (first hand job from a prostitute) that they can't wait to tell their kids and their grandkids about one day. Well I'd say that it's about time that we admit to being excited about telling our robots (first our robot servants, then our robot overlords) about these little miracles.

Come to Mama

Funny, this is exactly how I want to be photographed for the Delino swimsuit issue:

For a photo to accompany this article, his publicist, Pamela Johnston, suggested the following: “Layfield in a beach chair, wearing a suit and tie on the top and swim trunks on the bottom. N.Y.C. skyscape in background. Cabana girl serving him Mamajuana Energy on a silver tray.”

Read more about the potentially incredible effects of Mamajuana (sounds suspiciously like...) here.

The Sign of a True Patriot

I have set all of my clocks to automatically skip the time 9:11 both times that it occurs every day. It's just too soon to deal with the emotions that come up when I see those digits. So 9:10 always becomes 9:12 and I can glance at my clocks without worrying about my day being ruined.

Catching up is hard to do

After being on vacation for a week, then having to do a lot of stuff at work and then go on jury duty I have fallen very far behind on my Google Reader. Can someone please make a new feed of the best of my friends' shared items? I'm not sure whether finding an apartment or getting caught up on Google Reader is more stressful.

Is there something in the water?

Or maybe they are just having too many babies over in India...

In case you were curious...

This is what a medium rare steak looks like at Luger's.

I woke up early on my born day...

I'm twenty-five, yes I made it, I beat Contra this morning,
a bet you should have faded. Squash at the YC, Tang Pavilion for lunch,
MoMA in the afternoon, catching an Italian movie on a hunch.
Ended up at Luger's, where steak is the thing, a rare treat of meat
and a meal fit for kings, or just another birthday for the Berger twins.

April Fool's Day

Basically it just gives everyone a good excuse to do something mean and then say "April Fool's!" Now if only I could think of something mean to do...